Kids who are bullied often wonder, “Why me? Is it my clothes? My grades? My glasses? My weight? My hair? My skin? Maybe I deserve it because I’m not on a sports team, or because….”
Stop. Hold it, hold it, hold it! Those feelings are completely understandable, but the fact is, no one deserves to be bullied. For anything. Never. Not ever. So if bullying is happening, stop thinking there’s something wrong with you.
Instead, start working with others to change what is happening. Teens and kids can talk with trusted adults—parents, guardians, relatives, teachers, guidance counselors, or community leaders—and tell them what’s going on. Adults can help work out strategies and responses to handle the situation.
Bullying isn’t stronger than teens or kids and the adults who care about them working together.
Check out these ideas:
Elementary school students: PACERKidsAgainstBullying.org > Smart Stuff > Stop It! If You Are A Target
Middle/high school students: PACERTeensAgainstBullying.org > RESPOND
Friday, April 9, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Got Power?
Got Power?
Bystanders don’t need to just “stand by.” If they witness bullying, they can stand UP and speak out. When they do, they’re powerful. Seriously powerful. More than 60 percent of bullying situations will end when another student gets involved.
Getting involved doesn’t necessarily mean jumping into the middle of a fight—or even doing something publicly. It could mean giving the targets of bullying a little support, like telling them they didn’t deserve what happened. A few kind words—even spoken in private—are powerful. They let the person know someone cares and they’re not alone. That’s powerful.
When bystanders do nothing, it’s like saying bullying is more powerful than they are, than everybody is. And that’s just not true. If silence indicates agreement, speaking up shows who’s really got the power. The power to say no to bullying and yes to true coolness. Link arms, stand strong, and remember: Together we are powerful!
From "Kerv": My 9th grade focus group plans to take on this topic [bullying prevention and awareness] and to air out some feelings, experiences, impressions, and talk through a few strategies. Your website is going to be very helpful. One thing we began to discuss is the permission we give bullies to continue their hurtful and damaging behavior is when nothing is said in opposition. Sometimes "saying" is giving a disapproving look, verbal acceptance of the victim, and even calling out the BULLY POLICE -- protests by peers and adults who could impose sanctions/meaningful interventions against the bully. Sympathetic students must be willing to stand up on behalf of the bullied student more than once until the bully finds no allies or supporters. Well this is the approach my 9th graders want to take as an action on behalf of the student being bullied and strategies that decrease bullying
Bystanders don’t need to just “stand by.” If they witness bullying, they can stand UP and speak out. When they do, they’re powerful. Seriously powerful. More than 60 percent of bullying situations will end when another student gets involved.
Getting involved doesn’t necessarily mean jumping into the middle of a fight—or even doing something publicly. It could mean giving the targets of bullying a little support, like telling them they didn’t deserve what happened. A few kind words—even spoken in private—are powerful. They let the person know someone cares and they’re not alone. That’s powerful.
When bystanders do nothing, it’s like saying bullying is more powerful than they are, than everybody is. And that’s just not true. If silence indicates agreement, speaking up shows who’s really got the power. The power to say no to bullying and yes to true coolness. Link arms, stand strong, and remember: Together we are powerful!
From "Kerv": My 9th grade focus group plans to take on this topic [bullying prevention and awareness] and to air out some feelings, experiences, impressions, and talk through a few strategies. Your website is going to be very helpful. One thing we began to discuss is the permission we give bullies to continue their hurtful and damaging behavior is when nothing is said in opposition. Sometimes "saying" is giving a disapproving look, verbal acceptance of the victim, and even calling out the BULLY POLICE -- protests by peers and adults who could impose sanctions/meaningful interventions against the bully. Sympathetic students must be willing to stand up on behalf of the bullied student more than once until the bully finds no allies or supporters. Well this is the approach my 9th graders want to take as an action on behalf of the student being bullied and strategies that decrease bullying
Friday, March 12, 2010
Bullying ends when people stand together to change what has happened to so many for so long. It stops when people like you stand up and say, “Enough!”
• Enough of feeling unsafe in school!
• Enough of avoiding school, and slipping grades, and not being able to concentrate!
• Enough of lost self-esteem and self-confidence!
• Enough of stomachaches and headaches that stem from fear!
Had enough? Stand with others to show you care.
Add your name to “The End of Bullying Begins with Me” petition.
Add your comment to “I Care Because . . .”
"if this movement helps stop bullying from happening to one person then i think it is awesome, I’m so proud to be a part of it." Ally, 14, WA
Your support:
• Strengthens the cause
• Shows those who are being bullied that people care
• Unites others who are willing to stand against bullying
• Creates schools that are safer for all
• Influences changes in laws to protect students
Want to do more?
Ask your school, organization, or community to encourage students, members, and others to sign the pledge. Download a toolkit for this activity at PACER’s Bullying Prevention Project Web site.
• Enough of feeling unsafe in school!
• Enough of avoiding school, and slipping grades, and not being able to concentrate!
• Enough of lost self-esteem and self-confidence!
• Enough of stomachaches and headaches that stem from fear!
Had enough? Stand with others to show you care.
Add your name to “The End of Bullying Begins with Me” petition.
Add your comment to “I Care Because . . .”
"if this movement helps stop bullying from happening to one person then i think it is awesome, I’m so proud to be a part of it." Ally, 14, WA
Your support:
• Strengthens the cause
• Shows those who are being bullied that people care
• Unites others who are willing to stand against bullying
• Creates schools that are safer for all
• Influences changes in laws to protect students
Want to do more?
Ask your school, organization, or community to encourage students, members, and others to sign the pledge. Download a toolkit for this activity at PACER’s Bullying Prevention Project Web site.
Friday, March 5, 2010
“It’s the new bathroom wall.” The old days when mean things were scrawled on the bathroom wall have gone high tech. The new “bathroom wall” reaches the whole world: It’s cyberspace—and it can’t be painted over. The Internet, social media, texting on cell phones, digital cameras, and more make it quick and easy to distribute pictures, information, and personal opinions to millions.
When those thoughts and images are intended to hurt or harass someone, it’s called cyberbullying—and it’s everywhere. More than 80 percent of teens report being bullied while using technology. The fact that the bullying is broadcast to the world can make it hard to escape. Even home, once a haven from bullying, can be infiltrated with threats and attacks with the click of a mouse or the tap of a “send” button.
It’s complex new territory for teen and parents alike. So what can you do? Parents and teens (or tweens) can work together to set rules before getting that first cell phone or creating that first social media account. Just as there are rules for going to the mall and curfews for staying out late, there need to be rules for how to handle cyberbullying. Parental overreactions, such as taking away the cell phone, may be well intentioned, but they don’t address the bullying and may make teens hesitant to tell their parents about what’s going on.
While some kinds of bullying can be covert and outside an adult’s awareness, cyberbullying is very public and overt. While cyberbullying can be very painful, the up side is that it leaves a trail of evidence that can document the problem and be used to hold the person who’s bullying accountable. If you are aware of cyberbullying, print the offending Internet page, save the texts, and keep a record of how technology is being used to hurt, intimidate, and harass. Such proof can be very powerful in addressing the situation.
Handling cyberbullying is not as easy as painting over the scrawl on the bathroom wall, but it can be managed. The first step is learning what you can do. Visit http://PACERTeensAgainstBullying.org and click on Respond>Bullying: Unplugged.
When those thoughts and images are intended to hurt or harass someone, it’s called cyberbullying—and it’s everywhere. More than 80 percent of teens report being bullied while using technology. The fact that the bullying is broadcast to the world can make it hard to escape. Even home, once a haven from bullying, can be infiltrated with threats and attacks with the click of a mouse or the tap of a “send” button.
It’s complex new territory for teen and parents alike. So what can you do? Parents and teens (or tweens) can work together to set rules before getting that first cell phone or creating that first social media account. Just as there are rules for going to the mall and curfews for staying out late, there need to be rules for how to handle cyberbullying. Parental overreactions, such as taking away the cell phone, may be well intentioned, but they don’t address the bullying and may make teens hesitant to tell their parents about what’s going on.
While some kinds of bullying can be covert and outside an adult’s awareness, cyberbullying is very public and overt. While cyberbullying can be very painful, the up side is that it leaves a trail of evidence that can document the problem and be used to hold the person who’s bullying accountable. If you are aware of cyberbullying, print the offending Internet page, save the texts, and keep a record of how technology is being used to hurt, intimidate, and harass. Such proof can be very powerful in addressing the situation.
Handling cyberbullying is not as easy as painting over the scrawl on the bathroom wall, but it can be managed. The first step is learning what you can do. Visit http://PACERTeensAgainstBullying.org and click on Respond>Bullying: Unplugged.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
“Just ignore it.” Three little well-intentioned words adults have said and generations of kids have heard about bullying.
Well, it's time to ignore that advice. Why?
“Just ignore it” loosely translates into:
• “It’s not that big a deal.”
• “You're tougher than that.”
• “It will just go away if you pretend it isn't happening.”
• “It is just part of growing up.”
In other words, “there’s nothing you can do.” And that’s just not true. When a kid tells an adult about bullying, it’s a great opportunity to talk about what can be done. It’s a chance to find responses that are appropriate for the situation and the kid’s comfort level.
Does anything go away by ignoring it? Homework doesn’t. Bills don’t. And neither does bullying.
Well, it's time to ignore that advice. Why?
“Just ignore it” loosely translates into:
• “It’s not that big a deal.”
• “You're tougher than that.”
• “It will just go away if you pretend it isn't happening.”
• “It is just part of growing up.”
In other words, “there’s nothing you can do.” And that’s just not true. When a kid tells an adult about bullying, it’s a great opportunity to talk about what can be done. It’s a chance to find responses that are appropriate for the situation and the kid’s comfort level.
Does anything go away by ignoring it? Homework doesn’t. Bills don’t. And neither does bullying.
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