BULLIES and BYSTANDERS: WHAT EXPERTS SAY

Bullies and Bystanders What Experts Say

  

 

SHOUT OUT

Special thanks to Be Smart. Be Well. for Detective Hollendoner of the Chicago Police Department and me in their important new video Bullying: Stand Up, Don’t Stand By.

Julie Hertzog
Director, PACER’s National Bullying Prevention Center

Julie Hertzog is a nationally recognized leader on bullying prevention. As director of the National Bullying Prevention Center, she has led the development of a variety of curricula and resources, including creating content for the Center’s innovative websites, PACERKidsAgainstBullying.org and PACERTeensAgainstBullying.org, which were designed to engage, educate and inspire students. In 2012, she was appointed as a member and co-chair of Minnesota’s Governor’s Task Force on the Prevention of School Bullying; and in 2013, she was an external reviewer for “Bullying Surveillance Among Youths: Uniform Definitions for Public Health and Recommended Data Elements,” developed by the National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the United States Department of Education.

Det. Charles F. Hollendoner
Chicago Police Department

Detective Charles F. Hollendoner is a 22-year veteran of the Chicago Police Department. He has been assigned for the past 13 years as a Detective in the Special Investigations Unit. He is also a member of Cook County’s Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force and the Chicago Police Department’s Internet Child Exploitation Team. He has conducted numerous Internet Safety Presentations to elementary and high schools students, as well as community leaders and parents throughout Chicago.
The viewpoints expressed here by Det. Hollendoner are his own and not those of the Chicago Police Department.

 

 

 

INSPIRED BY DOWN SYNDROME

I love this story, posted in TELESCOPE magazine, because it shows that some of our most powerful lessons are those that we learn from our children.

By Heather Ronaldson

 

Before Julie Hertzog’s son, David, turned three years old, he had already undergone three open heart surgeries, a tracheotomy and required a breathing ventilator. David was born with Down syndrome.

 “There was no doubt about it: My son wasn’t like his peers,” said Hertzog in a self-authored article online in 2010.

 

As David was preparing to enter kindergarten, Hertzog feared that David would become “a poster child for children expected to be the targets of bullying,” she said, as David was nonverbal, had delayed cognitive abilities and received his nutrition from a feeding tube.

Instead of sitting on the sidelines and watching, Hertzog decided to do something about it. She became David’s advocate: talking with students, faculty and staff to educate them about Down syndrome.

 

“I remembered how kids with disabilities were treated in my generation, so I didn’t want that to be his experience,” said Hertzog.

 

Hertzog joined the PACER Center, a resource for children and young adults with disabilities and their families in 2000 and soon after headed its National Center for Bullying Prevention in Minnesota. Through it, Hertzog has created replicable peer advocacy programs for students across the country in the same way peers first helped David.

 

“The concept sounds simple, but because my son can’t tell me what happens during the day, I depend heavily on these peers to act as his voice. Now, what started as four kids in sixth grade has evolved to a school-wide project with more than 40 students volunteering to become peer advocates so they can help David and other students who are different,” said Hertzog in her article.

 

“It had amazing outcomes,” said Hertzog.

 

The peer advocacy model is now available online so other schools can create programs in their cities.

David is 17 now. “He is always at the core of my thoughts when I’m thinking about anything,” said Hertzog.

 

Hertzog has developed classroom toolkits, curricula and other resources through the National Bullying Prevention Center. She also created nationally recognized events such as PACER’S National Bullying Prevention Month, Unity Day and Rock, Walk, Roll Against Bullying, in October.

On Unity Day, people are encouraged to wear the color orange to show solidarity, said Hertzog. “That event has continued to grow and evolve and we expect it to be bigger than ever.”

 

Measuring the success of anti-bullying programs isn’t easy, as “we are looking to change the social paradigm,” said Hertzog.

 

But there are positive outcomes.“People are starting to understand the topic better than before. We’re starting to see real change happening. That to me is so encouraging.”

 

Hertzog recalled one year when Blue Earth, Minnesota was temporarily referred to as “Orange Earth” in honor of bullying prevention month. General Mills even dressed its 55-foot Jolly Green Giant statue, which stands in Blue Earth, in orange.

 

Hertzog said one student said, “I wish the Green Giant would wear orange year-round so it’s not an issue today, but an issue year-round.”

 

While her work can be overwhelming, Hertzog said that in those moments, she looks through the lens of her son.“I look at myself first and foremost as a mom and I think that my son David has taught me to see human dignity for all regardless of who you are—that you have the right to go to school to feel safe, valued and respected. He’s been such an important piece of always keeping me grounded,” said Hertzog.

This article posted as a blog to the StopBullying.gov website provides insight into bullying and suicide.

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Bullying and Suicide: What’s the Connection?

 

Post date: December 30, 2013

By: Alana Vivolo-Kantor and Helen Singer, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Ingrid Donato and James Wright, Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration

In the past decade, headlines reporting the tragic stories of a young person’s suicide death linked in some way to bullying have become regrettably common. There is so much pain and suffering associated with each of these events, affecting individuals, families, communities and our society as a whole. There is an increasing national outcry to “do something” about the problem of bullying and suicide.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and other violence prevention partners are conducting research to learn more about the relationship between these two serious public health problems with the goal of using what we have learned to save lives and prevent future suffering. One example of this work is in September 2010, the CDC brought together a panel of experts who presented research focusing on this complex relationship between youth involvement in bullying (youth who bully, youth who are bullied, and those who bully and are bullied) and suicide-related behaviors (attempts, deaths, and risk factors associated with suicide such as depression). These experts published their results in a recently released special issue of the Journal of Adolescent Health. The eight articles included in the special issue help to clarify the complicated issues surrounding bullying and suicide among youth.

This is what we DON’T know about bullying and suicide:

• We don’t know if bullying directly causes suicide.  We know that most kids who are involved in bullying do NOT engage in suicide-related behavior.  It is correct to say that involvement in bullying, along with other risk factors, can increase the chance that a young person will engage in suicide-related behaviors.

Here is what we DO know:

• We know that bullying behavior and suicide-related behavior are related. This means youth who report any involvement with bullying behavior are more likely to report suicide-related behavior than youth who do not report any involvement with bullying behavior.
• Discussing bullying as directly caused by or as the only cause of suicide is not helpful and is potentially harmful because…
  1. It encourages sensationalized reporting, contradicts the Recommendations for Reporting on Suicide  and potentially encouraging copycat behavior.
  2. It focuses on blaming and punishing and does not give critical attention to the necessary support and treatment youth who are involved with bullying need.
  3. It takes attention away from other important risk factors for suicidal behavior that need to be addressed (e.g., mental illnesses, coping with disease/disability, family dysfunction, etc.).
  4. It perpetuates the false notion that suicide is a natural response to being bullied, which has the dangerous potential to normalize the response and thus create “suicide contagion” among youth.

So what can we do with this information? There are public health strategies that can be applied to the prevention of bullying and suicide. For example, increasing connectedness among youth and parents, other adults, and teachers may decrease bullying and suicide behaviors.
In 2012, the Federal Partners in Bullying Prevention worked with the Suicide Prevention Resource Center to conduct a webinar on bullying and suicide. For more information, tools and resources, please visit Stopbullying.gov’s Who Is At Risk section and Media Guidelines for Bullying Prevention.

Safe and Supportive Minnesota Schools Act — Signed Into Law April 9, 2014

 

It was very moving to be a part of Governor Dayton’s historic signing of the “Safe and Supportive Minnesota Schools Act", which took Minnesota from a 37 word statute to one of the most comprehensive laws in the nation.

 

This law is so important—as all students deserve to go to school and learn in an environment in which they feel safe, valued and supported. Governor Dayton summed up student rights eloquently during his speech “Nobody in this state or nation should have to feel bad about themselves for being who they are.” And 11-year-old Jake Ross stole the show with his moving words about his own experiences being bullied and his enthusiasm for the passage of the act when he voiced the thoughts of many gathered on the steps when he said, “I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time.”

 

 

The Short Bus Stops at My House

This is an essay written by my oldest daughter. I love it for many reasons—the first is that I am proud of the person my daughter is becoming, the second is that it's honest and insightful and the third is that it is a testimony of unconditional love and acceptance.

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"The Short Bus Stops at my House"
By Laura Hertzog (age 18) for her brother, David (age 17)

It’s funny how the length of the bus you ride has the ability to define you as a person. Personally, I rode the regular sized bus, the one the “normal” students rode to school. However, there was another bus that happened to stop at my house every weekday morning. The ...short bus, "the retard racer", the bus that was transportation for my brother. Yes, my brother rode the short bus and will forever be the root of some kid’s immature joke. Or even worse the root of some adult’s joke. My brother is defined by his transportation of getting to school. They look past his ability to smile while making his bed every morning, or him surviving five open heart surgeries before the age of five, or his ability to say “Luve you all.” It’s all looked past because of society’s standards of perfection.

Society has its stereotype of perfection for high school students. And let me tell you, the qualities of Down syndrome do not match our standards of perfection. Slurred speech, trouble writing, slowed motor skills, noticeable scars are the blunt indicators of the imperfections my brother has that society tells him and our family. His cognitive abilities will never meet education standards. I can remember the day my mom told me my brother did not meet the minimum of the bottom two percent on a standardized test. The anger stays with me today. The test didn’t show how far he has progressed from his starting point. It simply just related him to his other peers. He will always need to be in special education, he will always need a para helping him through the school day.

This may be how my brother is viewed in society but I can tell you this is long far how I view my brother. David may be 17 months younger than me but I view him as a role model, someone to impersonate. As I wake up in the morning, worried about if I will have enough time to put on make-up, and what the cafeteria is serving for breakfast, and how hard practice is going to be, and am I going to have someone to sit with at dinner tonight, and how I’m going to have to read 60 pages, and make sure I keep up on social media; not one of those things come as a concern to David. There is something beautiful about his innocence. His worries in life are so minor compared to the average person. His worries consist of grabbing his two favorite toys to bring with to school, making sure he brushes his teeth in the morning, and making sure the channel is tuned into the evening news at six. It’s humbling to observe

I didn’t ask for my brother to have Down syndrome, nor did my parents, nor did my brother. However, I know we can all agree David is the reason our family is so strong. It’s the reason my mother fights for to uphold human dignity every day. It’s the reason for my father’s compassion. It’s my reason for counting my blessings at night. It’s the reason for my sister’s generosity. Down syndrome may have put some road blocks in the way, may have caused some eccentric looks from strangers in the crowd, but ultimately Down syndrome has brought my family joy and has redefined perfection for each one of us.

And the short bus stopping at my house was the greatest blessing.

Special thanks to Jim Dillon for permission to share his article "The Best Antidote to Bullying? Community-Building".

 

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Published Online In Education Week: December 10, 2013

Published in Print: December 11, 2013, as The Best Antidote to Bullying? Community-Building

Commentary

The Best Antidote to Bullying? Community-Building

By Jim Dillon

 

Bullying doesn't wound students; it pours salt on a pre-existing injury, causing it to hurt even more. Most students who are bullied have already been hurt. They are wounded by exclusion when they find themselves without friends or allies. They are wounded when they fail in school, or when they don't gain the approval of their peers or, all too often, their teachers. They are wounded when they don't get the help they need. And they are wounded when they feel they have no place to go, or no one to talk to.

Preventing students from being hurt in the first place is the most effective way to thwart, as well as dramatically reduce, bullying. When students are members of a strong community, they feel accepted and supported, not isolated and excluded. They can trust that there will be someone to help them if they are in need. A school community is a place where people value each other and have a sense of responsibility for helping everyone feel safe and protected. Not all schools are communities, however.

Some schools focus solely on individual achievement. True, students need to be concerned about their own grades, about following the rules, and respecting their teachers; they should also be challenged, though, to care about the safety and the success of others. Students can learn how to support and defend their peers—and not just those with whom they share obvious similarities. Students should learn how to care about and defend those who might be different from them. As schools expect students to meet high academic standards, so can they expect students to meet high moral standards.

When schools lack a strong sense of community, the result is an environment in which students gravitate toward either "the winners" or "the losers." Students quickly learn the difference, as well as the importance of associating with the popular kids.

 

"When students are members of a strong community, they feel accepted and supported, not isolated and excluded."

Students who bully often seek to improve their social standing and demonstrate their social prowess to their peers. They carefully select as their targets the most unpopular students, those without friends or allies, in an attempt to earn a place in their desired social group.

Students who witness bullying often refrain from standing up for the victims, not from a lack of empathy but from the fear of being associated with the targeted student. Unfortunately, their reluctance to intervene or report bullying gives tacit approval to the student who bullies, giving that student license to continue. And the problem grows—other students are tempted to bully as a way to move up the social ladder.

The problem is compounded because students who bully strike beyond the radar of adult supervision. This is a subtle pattern almost impossible to detect by even the most caring and competent educator. Under these conditions, bullying can persist in even the most successful and high-achieving schools. The methods that successfully control other inappropriate school behaviors don't work when it comes to bullying. In fact, educators who are effective classroom managers are often unable to control the bullying that can happen in plain sight.

For educators to be effective at bullying prevention and reduction, they must shift their attention from only disciplining students who bully to empowering students who could be in a position to stop it.

When bystanders are given the skills, the confidence, and the courage to intervene or report abusive behavior, the student who bullies is disempowered. When the number of students who defend and protect their vulnerable peers grows, the school's social norms shift from the unspoken acceptance of bullying to one where bullying is not tolerated.

 

Building a strong school culture in which this behavior violates social norms is a challenge—often, even more difficult than implementing policies or programs. But it is also a necessary goal for any school. It requires a commitment for changing how individuals see and treat each other. It requires the nurturing and strengthening of the school's social connections. When bullying prevention is reframed as community-building, it moves from a problem-solving scenario to an opportunity for improving the learning environment for everyone.

Schools can begin this healing and healthful process by asking staff members and students to consider and discuss the differences between a group of individuals and a community. Students should explore what their responsibilities and obligations to their peers are. Staff and students should talk about the existing challenges and the barriers to helping others. From these discussions, the school community can develop specific strategies for what to do and say when anyone witnesses an act of bullying. Students can and should play a role in planning how to make their school a better place, to insure that everyone is treated with respect.

When schools encourage these discussions, they send a message to students that looking out for others is one of their core values. Educating students to take ownership and responsibility for their learning environment is the best preparation for becoming good citizens.

As schools become stronger communities, they provide students with the protection and the platform they need for continuous growth and learning. This should be the goal of bullying prevention and for how we educate all students.

Jim Dillon is the director of the Center for Leadership and Bullying Prevention, in Albany, N.Y. He is a national consultant on bullying prevention and school climate. A retired teacher and school administrator with 35 years' experience, he is the author of The Peaceful School Bus (Hazelden, 2008) and No Place for Bullying (Corwin, 2012).